MOTHER'S DAY
by Pastor Jim Lincoln on May 11, 2008
By now, you should know that today is Mother's Day. If this is a surprise to you, you're in big trouble. Someone passed on to me these valuable lessons of life her mother taught her. She said her mom taught her...
To Value A Job Well Done by saying...
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning your room."
About Time Travel when she said, "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
Logic: "Because I said so, that's why."
Foresight: "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
Irony: "If you keep crying like that, I'll really give you something to cry about." My favorite is, "If you break your leg on that motorcycle, don't come running to me."
Osmosis: "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
Stamina:"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
Hypocrisy: "Do as I say and not as I do." "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
Circle Of Life: "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
Envy: "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
Anticipation: "Just wait until your father gets home."
Receiving: "You are going to get it when your father gets home!"
Medical Science: "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
How To Become An Adult: "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
Wisdom: "When you get to be my age... you'll understand."
Justice: "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out... just like you.
Evolution: The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had it to do over again. "Yes, of course!" she replied. "Then she added, "But not the same ones."
I was blessed to have a mom who did many things well. She convinced me that she was for me and that she loved me. A mother's love can cover a multitude of sins in the world. So today, we want to honor moms and show deep respect for what you do. More so, we want to honor God who created you and came up with such a good idea.
Proverbs is the collection of lessons and sayings of king Solomon. God gifted him, as no other, with insights into nature, life and how things work in this world. At the same time, Solomon had feet of clay and a divided heart. He was a man of numerous contradictions rejecting much of what he knew to be good. He collected wives the way Amelda Marcos collected shoes. And to accommodate them, he built pagan temples so they could worship their pagan gods and spread paganism in Israel. He overtaxed the people and conscripted fellow Jews into slave labor camps to work on his extravagant building projects.
As king of Israel, Solomon had enormous power and authority. But, he did treat his mother well. Bathsheba was his greatest advocate. When David was dying, Adonijah, Solomon's older brother, attempted to assume the throne. Fearing for her son's life, Bathsheba appealed to David on behalf of Solomon, and reminded David of his promise that Solomon would inherit the throne.
David kept that promise and Solomon became the new king. Later, when Bathsheba came to Solomon, when she walked in, he stood up to greet her. Then he bowed before his mother and had a throne set beside his throne for her to sit in. She was his mother. My dad taught me that when a woman enters a room, you stand up. You follow Solomon's example.
Even though Solomon had a divided heart, God did grant him his request for wisdom. Proverbs is a collection of that wisdom. In this first proverb, Solomon reveals to us a number of lessons about God that we can see through the lens of godly mothers.
I want to look at three of them. 1. God gives moms the first principle of parenting. 2. He tells us the content of a mother's teaching. 3. He promises great reward to the child who listens and doesn't forsake the godly instruction of his parents'.
THE FEAR OF THE LORD:
THE FIRST PRINCIPLE OF MOTHERING
Although it's listed last in the proverb that ends in v.7, this principle or priority is the main point of the introduction to the proverbs. It's also the main point of the book of Proverbs and the main point of parenting. Here it is, "THE FEAR OF THE LORD IS THE BEGINNING OF WISDOM."
In other words, everything Proverbs says, every pithy saying, every accurate observation about life and every moral exhortation are given to lead us to an awe-filled respect for God. Proverbs begins by including moms as a primary teacher of this wisdom. It also ends with moms as a primary teacher of the same wisdom. Pr.31:30 says, "The woman who fears the Lord, shall be praised." So, the whole book, the instructions of chapters 1-9 and the sayings of chapters 10-31 is framed by the reality that the fear of the Lord is the beginning or cornerstone of wisdom. And a mom's role in passing on that wisdom frames the entire book.
Most of the advice you get today in Dear Abby or Parents magazine attempts to share wisdom without connecting it to God. In their minds, God is irrelevant to parenting. Proverbs 1 says this is foolishness. And beloved, it's also foolish for the church, in the effort to be relevant, to comb through the Bible looking for practical advice for success in being a mom or a dad, assuming talk about God isn't practical or relevant. Because you've been created to serve the living God with your whole being, and commanded by God to do so, nothing could be more relevant to you than to consider how to do just that.
Who cares if you or your children are a huge success in every thing they set their minds on doing, and yet, fail to serve, know, and worship the God who made them, sustains their life, and offers them eternal hope? Who cares if you succeed at everything, and yet, fail to lay hold of the very reason for which you have been created or miss out on the blessings of eternal life in Jesus Christ? Jesus put it this way, "What does it profit a man if he shall gain the whole world, and yet, lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?" Mtt.16:26
The point of Proverbs is that wisdom, good mothering, and good fathering is about bringing all that is into relationship to God, so that He is recognized for who He really is. And that is, that He is the center of everything and relevant to everything as Lord of all. There is no place in your life where God isn't relevant.
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom." This is a mom's priority for her children. This same theme is sustained throughout the book. "In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence . . . The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life" (Proverbs 14:26-27). "The fear of the Lord leads to life, so that one may sleep satisfied, untouched by evil" (Proverbs 19:23).
The goal of Proverbs and a mother's teaching is that our posture towards God is that which influences all of our decisions and actions. And it's precisely that posture before Him that makes us either wise or foolish. Solomon says in v.7, "The fool despises this wisdom and instruction."
So, to teach a child to fear the Lord, means to teach him what to respect above all things. On the other hand, the fool wishes to be his own authority. He doesn't know who to respect above all or who to fear the most. This is how we come into this world, seeking to be our own authority.
AVA: FAIR AND TERRIBLE.
I love my eighteen-month old granddaughter. And, of course, Ava is above average in every respect. I can say that without a hint of bias. Yet, Ava wants to be in charge. She wants to be the final authority for her life. No one has to teach her this. And she will do just about anything in her power to get what she wants. She has hit her mom, thrown herself down and beat the floor. Last week she and her mother were at Costco. She found a book with Elmo's favorite songs. So, Rebekah let her play with it while they were shopping. That book brought her so much pleasure that Rebekah decided to buy it for her. However, when they got to the check out counter, Ava wouldn't let go of that book so the checker could scan it in the computer. She gave that man the evil eye, said, "No" and put her back between that book and the clerk. Later, when they were at another store, while holding the book in her stroller, a woman stood right next to Ava's stroller to do her own shopping. Do you know what Ava did? She hit that poor innocent woman because she thought she was getting near to take her book away. Ava wants to be the final authority of her life.
Now, as we get older we learn more sophisticated ways to usurp God's authority. However, because the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, learning to turn away from the illusion that you are in charge and that you are the authority of your life is wisdom. Turning to a life that honors God above all things as the one who authored you and therefore has authority over you, is what keeps a child or an adult from eternal foolishness.
So, the foundation of a mom's influence will go far beyond teaching her children to brush their teeth, to say "please and thank you," or which side of the plate your fork should rest. Above and before all of these things, God calls moms to teach their children the proper fear of the Lord, to reverence God, live for His glory, yield to His will, rest in His promises, trust in His word, rely on His power, seek His glory, acknowledge His rule and reign and enjoy His salvation in His Son the Lord Jesus above and before everything else. All the other things need to be taught. A kid needs to eat his vegetables and do his homework. But, a life of repentance, faith, and respect before God is foundational to everything else.
Also, we can't give away what we don't have, right? So, the calling to teach these things is a calling to for us as parents to live them in such a way that makes our words credible. THE FEAR OF THE LORD (fear as respect, wonder and worship) IS THE BEGINNING OF WISDOM.
"...YOUR MOTHER'S TEACHING (TORAH)"
The second lesson I want us to consider is the CONTENT or the material of a mother's instruction.
First, notice that parenting is supposed to be a team sport. I know there are times this can't be. When my dad left my mother, she became a singe parent and had no choice but to rear her children alone. But, Proverbs teaches us that the home is the school of faith and both parents are the teachers. The word used for a father's instruction is the Hebrew word, (Heb. mutsar). It carries the idea of discipline or instilling positive disciplines, habits and ordered commitments in life as well as correction. Children are called to listen to a father's discipline. However, when he addresses moms, the Hebrew word for teaching is the word TORAH. And TORAH refers the first five books of the Bible or Genesis through Deuteronomy. The TORAH is the written history of God's dealings with the world and specifically His dealings with Israel his covenant people.
In other words the content of a mother's teaching is the history, heritage, and covenant relationship God established with the world and with Israel. Her material is the history of Adam and Eve, and God's promise to them to bring a Savior in spite of their rebellion and give her children hope in their own rebellion. It's the history of Seth and how his descendants were almost wiped out by the genocidal effort of the Cainites and how God was faithful to save Seth's last remaining descendants (Noah and his family). She is called to pass on to her children the story of Abraham who was counted righteous by faith and how through a miracle of grace, barren Sarah came to have her son Isaac. And how God provided a lamb for sacrifice in Isaac's place just as Jesus would be sacrificed in our place. She is called to teach the lives of Jacob, Joseph, Judah and how God rescued Israel out of the hands of Pharaoh. The Passover, Day of Atonement, and Israel's ancient worship in the tabernacle are all grist for her mill.
A godly mother is called to teach her children about Ruth, Naomi, Gideon, Samson, Deborah, Saul, and David. She was to teach her children the covenant God made with Israel in Deuteronomy and how Israel failed to keep it. And how God promised that he would send a Savior/King who would keep every commandment that God has given and then offered His righteous record to us as a free gift to be received by faith.
Teaching the TORAH is not merely the job of the father. It's God's call on moms, women of faith. It isn't the church's primary responsibility; it's a mom and dad's primary responsibility.
Once again, you can't pass on what you don't know. I can't wait to tell my granddaughter about great women of the Bible. Abigail the Wise who saved David's bacon. Tamar the Bold, Hannah the Faithful, Jael the Brave, "fair and terrible" who did battle with Sisera, and prevailed and Esther the Courageous. And there are boys to learn about who became men like David, Jonathan, and men of whom this world was not worthy like Uriah, Bathsheba's husband. Mostly, the TORAH is made up of a cast of sinners like us who only stand before God by His grace and mercy and a gospel hope that a Savior/Messiah would be sent to save us, so that we could have peace with Him...through faith in God's Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.
Proverbs says, "forsake not your mother's TORAH." But...are we giving them anything to forsake? The fool despises wisdom and instruction. Will we become foolish under the spell of entertainment, sports and TV stupor? Or will we be wise and passing on the precious heritage and word of the Lord?
Let me give one New Testament illustration. It's the example of Timothy's mother and grandmother. In 1 Timothy 3:14-15 Paul says,
"You, however, continue in the things you have learned and become convinced of, knowing from whom you have learned them [that is, your mother Eunice and through her from your grandmother Lois]; and that from childhood you have known the holy scriptures [because your mother taught them to you] which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus."
They did what his father could not or would not do. They taught him the Scriptures, and the Scriptures brought him to faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. Timothy found hope, grace and life because his mother and his grandmother were faithful to Proverbs 1:8.
GOD ORDAINS REWARD
Lastly, this morning, God not only gives the priority of a mother's teaching and the content of her teaching, He also, ordains a reward for sons and daughters who do not forsake their mother's teaching. In v. 8, "Indeed, they will be a graceful wreath to your head and ornaments about your neck."
Where the fear of the Lord is valued, as the beginning of wisdom, where God's word is valued as the bread of life, (By this I mean where it really is enjoyed, loved, and treasured as the most satisfying of all words and where these things are prized and held precious), there is the anointing of extravagant blessing.
He says that hearing a father's instruction and not forsaking a mother's teaching will be like a wreath and a necklace of grace, glory and joy; it will be like receiving an extravagant and beautiful gift for your head and around your neck. Its joy isn't literal. God doesn't necessarily give jewelry to the faithful. Don't set your sights so low. He gives something much better: eternal ornaments of His grace, beauty, wisdom, love and joy. It will be a noticeable blessing to all who see. It will be a wreath of grace to your head and a crown of joy on your mother's head.
Paul said that the fifth commandment is, "the first commandment with a promise." There is a great promise in honoring your mother and father and embracing the fear of the Lord they teach.
"In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence . . . The fear of the Lord is a fountain of life" (Proverbs 14:26-27).
"The fear of the Lord leads to life, so that one may sleep satisfied, untouched by evil" (Proverbs 19:23).
These are the ornaments of grace: confidence, a fountain of life, satisfying sleep, and remaining unharmed by evil. When we fear God properly, we won't fear lesser things. The outcome is confidence, life, and good sleep. Who would trade jewels and financial prosperity for treasures like these?
When my daughter Christy began her aerobic business, she went to the Nike store to buy her supplies. She bought hundreds and hundreds of dollars worth of supplies. When the checker added up her bill and gave Christy the receipt, Christy walked away but thought that she had been undercharged. I saw her with her bags, looking over the receipt. The checker had missed an entire bag of clothes and shoes. For a nanosecond, she struggled with what to do. I was watching this whole thing. She went back to the checker and told her that a mistake had been made in her bill. The checker was impatient and rude and said, "I'm sure you are wrong. We don't make mistakes. Our scanners are always accurate." She was clearly telling Christy not to bother her. Then Christy persisted, "I think you have undercharged me significantly." That got her attention! The checker was stunned. Without an apology, she studied the receipt, looked at the bags of un-scanned supplies and redid the order. I later asked Christy why she persisted when the checker was so rude. She said, "Well, how could I take advantage of them when God has remembered me and treated me with such persistent grace and mercy? 'Do unto others,' Right?"
I want you to know how good it was to witness that. She was wearing ornaments of faith. She remembered the fear of the Lord as her wisdom. She didn't forsake the heritage of the word that had become her guide in life. She didn't forget the reward God ordains for children who do not forsake such wisdom. Her reward was a garland of righteousness around her neck and a crown or wreath of wisdom on her head. That was a good day.
But the best day was when the Lord Jesus, remembered His covenant love for the Father and us, when he didn't forsake His promise to save sinners like us. Remembering, wearing a crown of thorns, he went to the cross and died in our place. Isaiah asks, "Can a mother forget the nursing child at her breast? She may forget. But I will never forget you." (Isa.49) In the gospel Jesus never forgets us, His children. Here is the ultimate crown and garland of wisdom, beauty and grace. So, listen to Him.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, His word is the bread of life, and He ordains the reward of grace and gladness for those who fear Him. Amen.